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One hundred kilometres? That's only an hour's drive. One-hundred sixty kilometres? That might get me far enough to reach the neighbouring town, or maybe even the city. The screen refreshes, and three swipes later I am again staring at my own profile picture. Red circles radiate like sonar from my location, searching for any signs of life, with the words underneath: "There is no one new around you. I am one of many young professionals who start their careers in a small rural town.
After graduation I got my first job in Sioux Lookout, Ont. With some young people migrating away from cities to find their first job , it creates a unique situation where young adults find themselves looking for love in places with limited options. Using dating apps like Tinder in a small towns has very different issues than in the city. A rural, heterosexual, female Tinderer me gets to swipe through about as many pictures of fish as she does human men. The irony of "there are many fish in the sea" is palpable. Small towns change the rules of the game.
In a place with a small dating pool and even fewer date spots to meet up, some interesting complications arise.
In big city centres it is considered weird, or even immoral, to date a guy your friend had already dated. In a small town, if you eliminated all the guys your friends dated, you'd quickly run out of men. Of course, there is still etiquette. You don't pursue anyone your friend dated seriously — but even then, with permission, it happens. Privacy is something I try not to hold onto too dearly in a place where everyone's connected by only a few degrees of separation. It feels like everyone knows everyone, and news spreads like a bushfire.
Even if you try to keep your dating life a secret, try to go out in public on a date and you will most likely run into someone you know — if not your entire extended family that actually happened to a friend of mine. I tried to keep a relationship a secret once.
Plenty Of Fish, Not Many Men: What Online Dating Looks Like In Small-Town Canada
I had only been in town about a month at the time, and I don't think I really understood just how small the place was. I went to grab a coffee one morning and ended up in line directly behind a Tinder date's ex-girlfriend. I proceeded to do what anyone would do in a socially awkward situation and stared at my phone.
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I was brought back to attention by another women entering the shop. It's at that moment I made eye contact with his ex-wife.
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The ex-girlfriend must have noticed, too, because the conversation she was having with her friend went eerily silent. So there we were: three women, waiting for our coffees in silence, heads down, phones out. Fortunately, my secret was safe and I was the only one aware of this absurd procession of exes.
A couple weeks later I was at the same guy's house having a fire. For the uninitiated, this is a common past time and a great date idea in small towns. At one point in the night, he got up to chop more fuel. One chop, axe enters wood. Two chops, wood splits. Three chops, THUD. He let out a line of expletives and limped over to the fire. Why not join seeking arrangement today and find someone who will pamper you like a free baby.
Afterward, I got pretty much assimilated into the local culture and forgot all about my Polish sites. I decided to give Polish Hearts a go. Case Studies By No Comments.
Man charged following knife assault at Hamilton, Ont. men’s shelter | CTV News
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